Some of us love the baby phase. Others adore our energetic toddlers and wide-eyed young children. There are those with a strong appreciation for the teen years (though I’ve never met a soul who loved a child the summer before they left for college).
I appreciated all those phases, but right now feels like the best years. Maggy and Sharon are independent young adults—all those financial sacrifices for education have clearly paid off—and now our relationship has moved into a new phase.
This past weekend we were all together for Mother’s Day. Here’s what I loved.
10. I used to go to Chucky Cheese with them. This weekend they treated their father and me to a fabulous grown-up meal at L’Artusi Restaurant (and we didn’t need a babysitter!).
9. I always planned the outings. Not this weekend. They organized a New York City extravaganza complete with brunch at the Tipsy Parson, stops at fun donut shops, wine tastings, and a field trip to Murray’s cheese shop.
8. I used to make all of the food decisions. No more. At Murray’s cheese shop, they spent a solid hour selecting some of the most exquisite cheeses and cured meat I’ve ever eaten.
7. I always made sure we had what we needed. On our Saturday morning 7-mile run, Maggy was the one who suggested we bring water. She was right!
6. Whether pulling out the map or stopping for directions, I always found the way. Between Sharon’s Droid and Tony’s impeccable subway knowledge, I followed them.
5. I used to help them shop for clothes. This weekend Maggy insisted I try on the lime green summer skirt in Ann Taylor Loft. It’s in my closet, and I can’t wait to wear it.
4. I used to style their hair (and sometime still do), but this weekend it was Sharon who took the time to make me feel pretty.
3. I was the one on the lookout for fun. This time they were the ones who made sure we enjoyed cocktails on the rooftop overlooking the Manhattan skyline.
2. I always got us where we needed to go. This weekend they knew exactly when to cab it, when to sub it, and when it made sense to walk.
1. I used to listen to their problems. On Sunday night the tables turned. This time I was the one who needed sage advice.
Thank you, Maggy and Sharon, for all of the above but especially #1.
Such a lovely countdown to the ways your mother-daughter relationship has evolved, Pam. I’m so glad to know and love your family. You raised those girls well, and now you’re reaping the rewards of all the love and devotion. Happy Mother’s Day (belatedly), and thank you for taking time to mother James and me a time or two. Being so far away from our own mothers, sometimes we really need it, and you’ve always come to our aid. We love you!
Mom, I love this post. You really know how to do top 10! Haha. We owe so much to you and Dad and all you did for us these past 20-something years. It makes me so happy to know that we can do for you now 🙂 What a weekend that was! When are you all moving to NYC?!
Beautiful post! Donuts (yay!) and 7 mile runs, hairstyling fun and heartfelt advice- I love the good humor and compassion you share with us.
BTW, very much looking forward to Pam’s new book this October- right in time for my birthday.
I love this post, and I know just what you mean. Not quite there with all independent young adults, one in college, one finishing high school and one about to leave job and go back to grad school — but it’s such a different relationship with the older ones and I think, more fulfilling. I am excited for the next phase when they are all FINANCIALLY independent!
love this post…
Pam: I have tears in my eyes. This is so nice. Knowing both girls…you are truly blessed. Nice job you both did as parents! Since my children are both 25, I too know how much fun they can be.
Happy Mother’s Day and I am thrilled you had such a great time. Congrats to my subway expert!!
The thought of those days with my kids makes me so happy. I know as they grow older I will long for the days when they are so cute and squishy but it’s also very exhausting. Thanks for this glimpse into what’s to come. It is also such a testament to how well you parented. Well done.
I’m having such fun with my teenagers, it’s great o know what fun lies ahead. You raised them with the right priority… Good food decisions! I hope mine follow suit. Facing instant empty nest in September, but know it will fill again soon.
How utterly wonderful!
This was such a sweet post! They’re so lucky to have you as a mom, and it sounds like you are just about the most appreciative mother ever. Love the NYC experience.
Pam – thanks so much for writing this! It shows me that one can get through the “Mom! She looked at me!” stage. 🙂 My kids are 7 and 3…how wonderful it is to have this to look forward to. For now, and as each stage passes, I’ll do my best to cherish the moments that make all the challenges of being a parent so worth it. 🙂
Wow! I can’t wait for my daughter, and son too, to be at that stage. My mom and I are very close and I look forward to that with my own.
I just recently came back from a long weekend with my daughter in LA. I thought for sure she would be the one moving home immediately after college. I thought for sure (after a few tear filled days in college) that she would be the one that would have a hard time finding a job after graduation. I thought for sure that she would need her mom just a little longer. Nope. I was wrong. On all counts. But those have been some of THE BEST surprises – to find that this amazing child has now become an AMAZING young woman who landed a fabulous job and handles her life very well (thank you very much). And we have a blast together. And she even picks up the bar bill!